Wed. September 10

Little update.

Been trying to eat better. Haven't been perfect, but better. Trying to have less carbs, more protein. Less goodies, more proper food. I've lots a little weight and I've noticed I've felt better for the last week or so. Hoping to have continued progress in the coming weeks.

Now, onto other news, I had a very interesting Monday. I won't go into great detail, but I had a collision with a dump truck while I was riding my bike to work. Luckily, it was barely moving, but it accelerated quick enough to catch me off guard, push me several inches to the right, and total my bike. It basically t-boned me and forced me to jump off my bike. On top of that, no one who witnessed this, including the driver of the truck, got out to see if I was alright. Nice, right? I can't believe people sometimes. Anyway, I was lucky enough to walk away unharmed, so I guess that's what matters most.

Lastly, I got a new tattoo today. It's my last name down my right calf in an Olde English type font. I think it looks pretty great and I'm super happy with it. :)

Well, that's all for now. Nighty night. 

Sun. August 17

Overdue blog. Sorry. Blah blah.

I've just been so tired from work. But anyway, good-ish news on the motivation front. And a big reason to be motivated. It has recently been confirmed that I'm going to Las Vegas in October (with the 'rents). Never been and I'm excited. I'm also sick of having all these vacation pics where I look like a fatty, so I'd really like to change that. And then, pretty much right after I get back, it's Halloween and my body fat percentage is too high for my number one costume choice. lol

Now, for the actual motivation, I finally had a quiet weekend, so I thought I'd try to get to the gym. I went yesterday afternoon, expecting it to be pretty busy, but it actually wasn't too packed. Didn't really have to wait for many machines or equipment. So, I thought I'd try again today and it went pretty well again. On top of that, I decided to try using the stairs at my friend's condo for some extra cardio and was able to run up 22 flights of stairs twice in less than 13 mins and burned like 157 cals. So, definitely gonna make this a regular thing. Just gotta get my eating under control. Hopefully that'll be easy enough though since I just stocked up on a bunch of fruits and veg and stuff. Now I just gotta get back in the habit of logging everything on myfitnesspal and hopefully things will sort themselves out.

Well, gotta be up early for work, so have a good night everyone. :)

Wed. July 2

Super super super super overdue update. Sorry.

I've been so busy and worn out from work, so I just kept procrastinating. Apologies.

Ok, so firstly, there hasn't really been any weight loss progress. In fact, I know I've put a bit of weight on. *sigh* -.- Can't say I dunno how it happened though. I know it's cuz I've been eating a lot of crap recently. My will power is like next to nothing and I'm a fat, shitty person. However, I'm hoping to be able to do better very soon cuz of recent developments.

Gonna try to keep this short, cuz this could potentially turn into some big ramble session. So, a friend of mine (who I'm always hanging out with) just got his first condo and it's pretty close to my gym. Which means I can kinda come and go as I please (on the weekends) without possibly annoying his mom and her husband. His place also has a small workout room and a pool. Nothing fantastic, but it's still better than nothing. I've also purchased a pair of 25lb hand weights, so I can do weight squats and various arm exercises at home. And I bought a swimming pass again for the summer. Really hoping this is gonna help me in the coming months, but it's mainly my eating that I need to work on.

So, that's all. Gonna try not to go this long without blogging in the future.

Love this. Want this!

Sat. May 24

Well, there's been a bit of a shake up at work this week.

Long story short, I'm gonna working 4pm-12am for the next couple weeks, at least. Obviously, there are pros and cons to this, but I'm gonna try to focus on the pros and make do as best I can. I figure this means I'll be able to hit up the gym 2-3 times a week before work. I'll ride my bike there, do some strength training, bike home, get ready for work, bike to work, work, and then bike home. That should be enough cardio, right? I think I'll see if I can talk to someone at my gym (for free) and see if they think that'll be enough activity. I think so though.

Also, I'm thinking of doing the 21 day no junk food challenge and the Fat Loss 4 Idiots meal plan at the same time starting on Monday. The no junk food thing is self explanatory. The FL4I thing requires you to eat 4 meals, spaced at least 2.5 hours apart, and you have to eat certain foods on certain days and all that. You can kinda mix and match your own meal plans and it's an 11 days on/3 days off type of program that I've had decent success with in the past. I feel good about this. Gonna need to stock up on some fruits and veg, but otherwise, I'm pretty prepared to start this.

So, ya, that's what'd been going on with me. Oh, and mt "work corset" arrived a few days ago and my back seems to be doing better since I've been wearing it. The only problem is my hips keep pushing it up and it stabs me in the ribs from time to time, so I need to loosen, lower, and retighten it during my 2nd break at work. lol

Hoping to have better things to report next week. Enjoy what's left of your weekends, everyone. :)

Me lol

Mon. May 19

First week of work: Done!

Holy Jeez. Well, it's definitely a physical job. I wore my heart rate monitor for the rest of the week and the lowest reading I got all week after a 10 hour shift was like 1700+. So, that's definitely good. However, my back's been hurting more and I did some additional walking on Wed and Thu and my.. feet.. were.. DONE! Oh man. I think I might have to start soaking my feet a couple times a week. However, if I bike to work, I shouldn't have this problem. And I'd like to start doing that, but it supposed to rain almost all of next week. God damn! But ya, we'll see. As for my back pain, I have ordered an underbust corset that I'll be using for back support and waist training. That should be arriving this week and hopefully will help.

So, on Friday morning, I decided to weigh myself and it appears as though I was up a few pounds. Maybe that's from swollen muscles, maybe crappy eating, maybe a full digestive system (if you know what I mean). So, I'm gonna give it another week and if I don't see any good changes, I think I'm gonna do the 21 day no junk food thing again. And try to up my protein intake to help build and repair my muscles. And so my body will start feeding off my fat stores.

Other than all of that, work's been pretty good. The people are still nice, the not caring about my appearance is great, I think I've adjusted to the early start hour pretty well. It's just the length of my shifts that are a little tedious. I guess I'll get used to those, but we only have 10 hours shifts cuz it's a busy season. Normally they're only 9 hours, but I've heard they can only be a few hours once in a while. Either way, so many more pros than cons and this coming Friday is pay day. Woot woot! :)

Mon. May 12

Had my first day at my new job today.

It went pretty well, I think. The people seemed nice, I picked up on a bunch of stuff fairly quickly. My back's currently kinda sore, but that's the be expected. I figured the work would be more strenuous than my previous job, but I had no idea until the end of my shift. I wore my heart rate monitor cuz I was curious how many cals I'd burn, but I dunno if I could've imagined this: in 9 hours, I burned 2285 cals. Holy jeez. Dunno if everyday is gonna be like that, but I'll wear the monitor for the rest of the week and see what the results are. If that ends up being the average though, and I can bring my calorie intake down, I could see some serious changes. Speaking of which, I was gonna weigh myself this morning and see what my starting weight was and then see how much weight I'd loss after 1 week, 1 month, etc., but the scale wasn't in the bathroom this morning (long story). So, oh well. Just gonna keep an eye on the physical changes instead, I guess.

That's all for now. Probably gonna be getting to bed a lot sooner than usual tonight. I'll let you guys know how things progress in the coming weeks. :)

Sun. May 4

News! News! Big, good news!

I got a new job! Woo! It's at a t-shirt printing company and I think it's gonna be very good for weight loss journey. I'm gonna be working a lot more and, from what I've heard, the job is gonna be a lot more physical than my last job. It's also about twice the distance from house, so that means I'll be getting more of a workout when I walk or take my bike. And with all the hours I'll be working, that's less time for me to be sitting at home binging. I'll be bringing my own meals, of course, and I'll make sure they're healthy. My only concern will be being too tired to get to the gym. But I'll have to see how things play out and how I feel. I'm sure it'll take a bit of time to get used to, but I mainly excited for the change and to not have to hide my tattoos, or remove my piercings, or worry about the colour of my hair. I'm sure that lack of stress will help my waistline too.

Anyway, don't have too much to report on the weight loss front. I pretty much broke even last month; I weighed the same on April 1st as I did on May 1st, but I've been trying to do better. And, like I said, the new job should help.

So, that's it for now.  I don't start my new job til the 12th and I've already worked my last shift at my other job, so I have lots of time to get to the gym and get my standing stamina up before starting at the new company. :)

Wed. April 23

Looks like I've found a way to get a different type of exercise this spring/summer.

My dad was cleaning out the garage earlier today and pulled out my bike. I hadn't ridden a bike in years, but I figured I'd ride it to the gym and see if it's something I could get into again. And it definitely is. It seriously cut down on my travel time AND I burned more calories and used a few different muscle groups. Way better than using a stationary bike at the gym.

So, I had my weigh in today and it was about as bad as I thought it be. Can't change the past though. Been trying to be a little better though. I had salads yesterday and today and low-cal soup today as well. Nothing major, but little things are better than nothing. I also had a bunch of my smoothie today and killed it at the gym. Hopefully next week will be better.

One thing I've been thinking about doing lately is seeing if I can go 5 days or a week without meat. Part of me thinks it's a good idea cuz you can totally survive without it. Those weirdo vegans do and they're skinny as hell. On the other hand, your body doesn't store protein, so if you eat too much, it's not gonna make you fat the way carbs do. And you need protein to build muscle, which I am trying to do. Hmm, might have just talked myself outta that idea. Maybe no carbs for those days instead. I've also been wanting to do days where I only have one type of food. Like only oatmeal, or yogurt, or just smoothies and veg. Gonna need to be a day that I don't get together with friends (for food) and where I have work, so I won't be sitting at home, wanting to binge on everything. Or I could make a rule for myself: no cheats 2 days in a row. For that, I'd try to be as good as possible, but if I do have a cheat meal/snack, I can't have a cheat the next day. There has to be at least one day of clean eating between being bad. *sigh* So many get thin quick "schemes". If only I had the balls to put them into action. :/

Anywho, time for bed. Asses and names aren't going to kick and take themselves tomorrow. lol

Tue. April 22

Old habits die so hard.

I've been trying to do better, but it's hard. I've definitely been eating how and what I used to; stuff that's really caused me to pack on the pounds. However, I dunno if I'm getting older, or if my body's trying to tell me that it's not putting up with this anymore. Last Tuesday, I ate a crapload of chocolate and gummies before bed and woke up thinking I was gonna throw up. Then, on Saturday, I had a decent breakfast/lunch, ate a bunch of sweets again, and by the time I had a really late dinner, I was feeling pretty sick again. This worried me partly cuz I hate being sick like that, but also cuz I was going to a buffet on Sunday afternoon. It looked like my stomach recovered fairly quickly though, cuz I didn't feel sick at all after the buffet. I actually probably coulda gone for a couple more plates of food, and I didn't appear to eat any less than I usually do. But anyway...

I feel like my work outs aren't as good as they've been in the past. I've been increasing the weight on my hand weights and weight machines, and I've been using the same cardio equipment for the same amount of time, but it seems like sometimes my heart rate doesn't get as high as it used to. Maybe it's cuz I've been going after work more recently and I'm already a little worn out from that (as opposed to going shortly after I've woken up). Or I need to up my resistance during my cardio. I'll see. At least any work out is still better than no work out. Kinda debating if I'm gonna go today. I went after work last night (at 11:30) and my thighs seem pretty sore today. Definitely gonna make a batch of smoothies today. Maybe I'll do that right after this and see how I feel.

Well, that's all. Weigh in tomorrow and I do not have high hopes.

Post buffet, lol

Wed. April 16

I feel like crap.

I know I've been eating pretty poorly for the last several days and I feel like it. I also weighed myself this morning and was up several pounds. On top of that, I had a bunch of chocolate and gummy candies last night and thought that I was gonna throw up several hours later. Why do I keep doing this to myself? -.- And, ya know what? I'm super excited to be going to Mandarin with my parents on Easter and stuffing my face. *sigh*

In other (slightly good) news, I got a 15 cent raise at work. And then, in June, minimum wage goes up, so I'll be making another $1/hr once that happens.

Ok, that's all.

Fri. April 11

Why do I keep going for long periods of time without blogging? If was this lazy in my weight loss, I wouldn't be as far as I am.

Anyway, let's get down to business. So, my birthday was this past Tuesday. I went out clubbing on Saturday night and then had a big dinner out on Wednesday. Both events were fun and it was nice to be able to hang out with some friends I don't get to see very often. I wasn't able to reach a mini weight goal I had set for myself for my BDay, but I got pretty close. I'm now bouncing between having lost 23-25lbs in total. I guess this is why you're only supposed to weigh yourself like once a week. Otherwise, your weight can be all over the place and it's hard to see the progress. But I really shouldn't complain. Slow and steady still wins the race.

I was talking to a friend recently who's been working on losing weight after having a baby and she just got to her goal weight. She looks good and all that and it got me thinking about my current goal weight. If I have approximately 6lbs left to lose and about 10lbs lost equals a dress size smaller, I'm definitely gonna have to re-evaluate my goal once this is all said and done. Like, I'll probably set myself a new goal of losing another 10lbs and then another 10 after that, instead of setting myself the daunting task of having to lose another 20-25 in one shot. I feel like I can do it. I just know it's only gonna get harder from here.

I think that now that all my birthday stuff has calmed down, it's time to refocus and really put a lot more effort into my weight loss, but mostly, just the eating properly. Lots of healthy stuff is gonna be on sale in the coming weeks and months. And I really need to stop looking at menus when I go out to eat. I know the healthier options for all the restaurants I frequent. I just need to order a salad ASAP so I'm not tempted by other delicious things. And I need to keep reminding myself that all my cravings are just cravings. I can live without them and try to not be an emotional bitch when I don't have chocolate or ice cream. Seriously. lol

I think that's all I'd like to say right now. REALLY gonna try hard to post something at least every few days. Even if it's very short. Alright everyone, enjoy your weekend. :)

Updated lol

Sun. March 16

I coulda sworn I'd posted a blog entry at least once this month. Apparently not though. Sorry guys.

Alright, so, first things first. As of Friday, I'd lost 21lbs since new years. Obviously, I'm very happy about this, but I'd just like to acknowledge something for those who may not know. Losing weight is not a steady decline. There can be a lot of ups and downs on the scale. For me, once I see that new lowest weight, that's the number that I stick with until the next lowest. Now, there actually hasn't been that much fluctuation for me in a while cuz I've been doing my best to eat well. But things like a full bladder or not having a bowel movement for a couple days can make it seem like you've put on weight or not lost any. This is why people say to pay attention to the inches more than the scale. And I've been trying to, but it's hard to not want to know. It's a constant struggle, but I have seen the inches get smaller, so at least I know I'm on the right track.

Ok, so, the game plan for this coming week is to make a huge batch of smoothie with added spinach as a low cal filler, go to the gym like 4 times, buy a lot of grapes cuz they're finally on sale (lol), and continue to purge all my really old Cosmo magazines. When I was cleaning the crap outta my room last weekend, I decided to start getting rid of some of my old Comsos. And when I say old, I mean it. My first copy (which I just came across yesterday) is from May '04. But mostly I have issues from about 2006 and on. What I've been doing is going through each issue really quick and tearing out any pics or articles I want to keep, but there haven't been too many of those. Overall, it feels good to be freeing up that space and de-cluttering my room a little.

I think that's all I have to say for now. Hope everyone has a good St. Paddy's day. My mom wants to go to a bar for green beer. It's kinda uncharacteristic for her, but whatever. lol

Yummy!

 

Wed. February 26

Well, I did it. :)

3 days left in the month and I was able to reach my goal for February; I got back into the 1X0's. Oh God. It's been so long and I'm so happy. Especially after the crappy weekend I had. This puts me at 17lbs lost total and now means my next mini goal is to get to 20 lost. I guess I can make that my March goal, but I'd like to think I could aim a little higher. However, slow and steady still wins the race.

I'd like to report that the 21 day challenge is going well, but... it's not that it's not, it's just that it could be doing a lot better. As you know, this past weekend was not great, but I was able to recover a bit over Monday and Tuesday and I was doing well today, except that I did split a poutine with a friend at dinner. Between the calories I burned at the gym and all the "better" things I ate today, it's probably not gonna ruin things in the grand scheme of things, but it's obviously a cheat. I'm probably doing worse for those this time around, but I'm really trying not to. Today is almost the half way point, so I have a bunch of time to redeem myself, but I really gotta be better prepared for temptations; both with healthier snacks and knowing what the healthier options are at the restaurants I frequent.

Things at the gym have been going well. I've gone everyday this week and I see no reason for me to not go tomorrow and Friday as well. Even a minor cold/sore throat couldn't keep me away. I know, it's not nice to go out in public when you're sick and risk making other people sick, but I made really good friends with all the hand sanitizer stations. And if I'm sitting at home, in bed, I'm gonna binge. I know it. Also, I've been trying to help shrink my stomach a bit by wearing a waist-training corset at night. Not some store bought thing with plastic boning. A real deal "my ribs are hurting and I can't bend over properly" corset. I'm sure there are findings that prove that this works, and some that prove it doesn't, but it makes me feel better and if I'm not hurting anyone but myself, why not? I'm wearing one as I type this and have it almost completely done up properly (with both halves at the back touching). At the beginning of the year, that would not have happened, so it helps me feel good about the inches I've lost. Speaking of which, I was able to fit into another pair of my old jeans fairly well today. So happy. :)

And one last thing making me happy is that apples and oranges are finally starting to go on sale, along with a few other veggies I can tolerate. Makes me feel like this is all so do-able and I'll be looking super good for my BDay (in April) and bikini season. Oh! And remember those dresses I posted pics of? The "sailor" and "tattoo flash ones"? I tried them on today for kicks and the zippers went up a lot easier and the sailor one may be a smidge too big now. Good thing I sorta know how to sew and take things in. haha

Alrighty, that's all. Gonna try to find a comfortable position to sleep in cuz I gotta kick some more ass and take more names in the morning. :)

The back of my corset. And a lot less back fat. lol

Sun. February 23

Belated blog. Sorry. Sorry. Let's get right to it.

So, I'll save you some long winded stories and just say that since I've started the 21 day challenge again, I'm down 4lbs. That puts my grand total of weight lost to 16lbs. I'm so proud. And it's been so long since I've seen that number. I'm like 1lb away from getting into a new, lower weight "class". So exciting. :)

My work outs have been going pretty well. I feel like I'm slowing getting stronger and my tighter work out pants are starting to fit a lot better, along with all my other clothes. I've also been trying to do other little exercises during a little free time at home or on the weekends (when I don't make it to the gym). Just some jump squats, simple push ups, and bicycle crunches. I know it's not much but, it's definitely something and every little bit helps.

So, yesterday, I had a huge cheat day. Like, it was super bad. I went to a Marlies game with some friends, so I knew there was gonna be bad food there, but I figured I could just find the healthiest food option I could and have that. I'd had some watermelon for breakfast, so I figured I'd just keep the good food trend going... and that did not happen. When we got there, we got poutine. I got just a plain one, thinking it wouldn't be as bad as if I got bacon or pulled pork on it or whatever. Then ,on the way out, they had these huge garbage bags of unsold popcorn. I happened to walk by a bag that was open, and just stuck my hand in to grab several pieces and started walking away. Well, my friend decided he wanted the whole bag. So, he just picked it up and started walking out. We all started pigging out on it and, after a while, I could tell it was having an effect on me. I was painfully bloated and just felt like crap. After hanging out for a bit, we went to a local Boston pizza to watch the UFC fight and I ended up hvaing 8 slices of a large meat lovers pizza. They were thinner slices, but still.  I knew there were going to be serious repercussions, so I just started drinking a ton of water. I had probably 8 glasses. Maybe a little more. Went pee a few times and started to feel better. In hindsight, I should've just bought my own "healthy" food at the area, not had so much popcorn, and passed on the pizza for a salad. I can't change the past, but I'm hoping next time I know better. I also hope this doesn't have a huge effect on my weight loss efforts. I'm sure it wont. One day won't make or break this, but still. Good thing I have a few days for grease and sugar to clear my system. Either way, I ended the day.

And so, onto today. I woke up just before 6am to get read to go back to that same Boston Pizza to watch the gold medal hockey game. Met up with some of the same people from last night and had another good time. They had a special breakfast menu on, but none of it seemed that appetizing. So, I just started chugging water again. Personally went through at least 2 pitchers, had a few BP mints, and that was it. Ending up going to a pub for "breakfast" at like 11am and had bangers and mash. Probably not the best choice again, but the caesar salad at this place is really crap and I thought I'd give something new a try. After that, came back to my friend's place, napped for a good few hours, had an apple and some of my homemade smoothie, and I'm now sitting here, typing this while feeling achy with a stuffed nose. Perhaps I should just go back to bed and try to drown this sickness with fluids. I'll see. Hopefully I don't stay sick for long cuz it kinda looks like I could possibly make it to the gym like 5 times this week, if I really try. At least 4 for sure.

So, that's everything up to this point. Hoping for some more good numbers this week. Just 1lb away from reaching my February goal and 1 week to do it. Pretty sure I can. Have a good week everyone. :)

P.S. - Go Canada! :D

Mon. February 17

Well, I'm doing it again.

I have completed day 1 of 21 days of no junk food again. And I'd say it went pretty well. I had work, so I wasn't just sitting around all day trying to deal with temptation. However, I was sorta tempted when my dad decided to bring home KFC for dinner, but I dealt with that by having oatmeal and peaches for dinner. :)

I foresee this attempt going fairly well. I have a bunch of apples, carrots, and cucumbers kicking around. I'm gonna grab some more frozen fruits cuz I'm just about out. I'm gonna make a list of quick meals/snacks that I can have an post it to the fridge door, so I just need to look at the list and not rummage through the pantries and whatnot. I'm also taking Slimquick; the pill that alleges you'll lose 3 times more weight than with diet and exercise alone. I've used it before, but during those times I really wasn't eating as well as I should've been for the program. I'm hoping this will end up being the perfect trifecta to get some really go results. Honestly though, with my weight at what it is now, I'd be ok with like a 5-6lb weight loss this time 'round. Really aim hoping for more, but it's kind of both in and out of my hands at the same time.

Anywho, that's all for now. I have tomorrow off, so once my nephew goes down for a nap in the afternoon, I'm gonna take off for the gym. I know he's not my responsibility, but my sister usually pawns him off on me or my parents so she can go run usual errands and I feel bad if one of my parents has to care for him by themselves. This is probably one of my bigger excuses for not going to the gym as often, and also why I prefer to go late at night, when he's sleeping. But, ya, this was supposed to be a closing paragraph and I turned it nto a mini rant about how my sister sucks. Whoops. lol

Night everyone.

Here's the dress from the party I went to on Saturday.

Fri. February 14

Ugh,  so much to say, but I don't wanna do some long-ass entry. Gonna try to do this in point form.

- Weekly weigh-in: Was up a bit, but I'm not super worried. Obviously, not happy, but these things happen and with the way I've been eating, I'm not surprised.

- I think I gonna do the 21 day No Junk Food Challenge again starting on Monday. Kinda debating if I actually wanna do the full 3 weeks or maybe just 2 or whatever. Gonna see how things go in the beginning and for how long I think I can go.

- I started running again. For a while now, the only cardio I did at the gym was the stairclimber and the elliptical (15-20 mins each), but I decided to see how my stamina was. So far, it seems pretty decent. My other cardio was pretty good at getting my heart rate up, so that's not a big issue, but I now realize what people say about running being hard on your joints. I wasn't super sore after, but my legs could tell we'd done something different. Definitely gonna add it back to my regime though.

- Today was an "everything fits" kinda day. I wore a plaid button up shirt that was looser than usual. I later put on a t-shirt I haven't been able to comfortably wear in years, and one of my tighter skirts wasn't as tight today. I also bought a dress for a party I have tomorrow night. The dress is a large and I can just about squeeze into it. It does look better with a pair of Spanx on underneath, but it's pretty passable without. And with the right accessories, it should be fine. I'll post pics after the party in a later post.

Ok, I believe that's everything. It's pretty late now, but I don't feel as tired as I should be. Gonna try to sleep anyway. Have a good weekend everyone.

Wed. February 5

Signs and symptoms of binge eating disorder:

• Eating even when you're full
• Hiding or stockpiling food to eat later in secret
• Eating normally around others, but gorging when you’re alone  
• Embarrassment over how much you’re eating
• Feeling guilty, disgusted, or depressed after overeating
• Desperation to control weight and eating habits 

These are not the only signs, but they are the ones that apply to me.

That's all I wanted to share today.

Oh, and I weigh the same as I did on Friday. I can deal with that.

Music joke

Fri. January 31

I had an unexpected little surprise this morning.

Again, I decided to weigh myself cuz I was curious if another day of good eating and going to the gym had made a difference and it looked like it did. I was down another 2lbs, putting my total for the month of January at 12lbs lost. That's 40% of the weight I was hoping to lose this year gone already. I know it's still gonna be an uphill battle, but it's encouraging. I know not to expect to lose that much every month, but seeing that much gone already is really good motivation. Another great motivator is the fact that I'm fitting into certain articles of clothing that I haven't been able to wear in a while or, in some cases, ever. And I'm starting to look better in some of the things I already where, including a few of my work out capris, which I bought a touch smaller than I should have months ago, but now they're feeling less tight. So, I'm pretty happy with all of this. And I'm still making my goal for February to be down another 5lbs, which will put me into the XX0's, which I haven't seen in quite a while and am very excited about. : )

So, February is gonna be a pretty interesting month. There's the Olympics and obviously I'm hoping Canada kicks ass, or just wins gold in hockey. I have another AHL hockey game lined up, and I'm going to 2 parties; one for a friend's BDay (a club with $3 drink specials, so I'm gonna get hella wasted) and a friendly acquaintance's Jack and Jill party (which is a Valentine themed masquerade). I'm really excited to go to these with my "new" body. I haven't seen these people in a while so, I don't wanna sound like an egotistical jerk, but I'm hoping for some positive feedback and stuff.
I watched a movie tonight called Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead and now I wanna go on a juice fast. lol. If you haven't seen this movie, you should. It's really interesting and sort of like the opposite of Super Size Me. I won't bother typing up the whole plot, but I do highly recommend it if you're struggling with weight or general health issues. And I'm not saying everyone should be going juice diets or anything, but maybe something someone says or a small piece of info can help some one out there with their struggles.

And lastly, speaking of struggles, I think I've pretty much decided on how to deal with the whole wanting to eat junk food AND healthfully AND continue lose weight. I'll have weekdays be my "good" days and weekends will be for "cheats". Not major food binges; don't wanna have a ton of vomiting episodes or digestive issues, but maybe just have one bad-ish meal a day, if I really feel like I "need" it. Dunno if I'll be bad starting this weekend, but maybe I'll allow myself one little indulgence. We'll see.

Okie, gonna get to bed now. Everyone have a good weekend. : )

Thu. January 30

Time for another weekly update.

K, so, with the 21 day challenge being over, I started eating some of the stuff I hadn't been allowed to in that time and it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, but it wasn't great either. By that, I mean I didn't have really bad stomach aches or heartburn or anything, but I did still start to feel a little blah. I also threw up again very early Sunday morning. Just a one and done deal, so obviously something didn't agree with me. It might have been a few cookies I'd had from Tim Horton's, but I'd bet money that it was probably the half of an unsalted soft pretzel with some peanut butter right before bed. Can underbaked pretzels make you sick? Anyway, ya, that sucked.

Moving onto yesterday morning, I had a feeling it wasn't gonna be a great weigh in and I was sorta right. I was up 2lbs, which I guess I shouldn't have been surprised about. Had to remind myself that the number on the scale only measures my relationship with gravity and all that crap. And, according to my goal of losing about 2lbs a week, that actually put me right where I should've been this week. But I used that weigh in as motivation to try and be good yesterday and it seemed to work cuz I lost those 2lbs again by this morning. So, maybe I'll go back to eating well for the next week and see if I can lose a little more weight. At this point, my new mini goal is to lose another 6 or 7lbs by the end of February. I think that's fairly attainable.

Alright, that's all for now. Gonna chill out for a little longer before I head to work. Everyone enjoy the rest of your day. : )

Newest tat I just got on Tuesday. On my right, upper shin.

Wed. January 22

Apparently, I had a minor case of stupid brain.

Something didn't "add up" properly when it came to keeping track of my weigh-ins, so I went back and took a look at my first post from this month to confirm. I've been thinking that my weigh-in day is Wednesday, but it's actually supposed to be Thursday. Not a huge deal though, I guess. I'd imagine I was approximately the same weight on Jan 1st as I was on the 2nd. So, I guess I'll just stick with it cuz the alliteration sounds better. lol

So, that being the case, I was down another 2lbs from last Wednesday. Obviously, I would've liked that random 3lb loss to stick, but c'est la vie. That was weird though. I wasn't dehydrated or anything weird, and normally if your weight is gonna fluctuate, it'll be up. Well, it was still nice to see that number; it had been a while. But, hopefully, by this time next week, I'll be down another 2.

Ok, so now, I'm sort of a loss for how to proceed since the 21 days are coming to a close. I wasn't the most faithful, but the only items I "cheated" with were 1 muffin, a few small pieces of white bread, a handful of tortilla chips once, and peanut butter, though I think that was a stupid item to be included in the list. I'd call the whole thing a success overall though. My clothes a fitting better, I'm feeling better. Last night, I even had a hot dog wiener and my stomach was not happy with me, probably cuz it had gotten fairly used to mostly natural foods. All the chemicals and preservatives really got to me. But ya, I'm not gonna go back to eating junk all the time, but I need to decide carefully how to reintroduce certain foods back into my diet. Never having pizza or cake again is not at option, but I don't wanna end up having a lot of tummy trouble all the time. Maybe just a couple cheat meals a week or something. That being said, I'm sorta considering keeping up the no chocolate or candy part of the challenge til the end of the month. I've gone this long, kinda wanna see if I can keep it going.

Alrighty, that's it. Everyone enjoy the rest of your day. : )

Bought one more new dress : )

Fri. January 17

Little blogging before work.

Ok, firstly, I had my interview yesterday. I think it went really well and it seems like a job I'd actually enjoy. The manager said she's looking to fill the position sooner rather than later and she'd let me know either way. So, fingers crossed. Also, my dress pants were a little looser than I remember, so that's good. lol

After the interview, I went Hot Topic cuz I had some coupons I wanted to use. I picked up 2 dresses, that I probably wouldn't have been able to fit into nicely like a month ago, but they looked pretty good yesterday. And I can't wait to see how they'll look in several more weeks. : )

Then I had yesterday off cuz we were gonna visit an aunt and uncle (who live 8 hours away) but they'd just come back from a vacay in Cuba and were 20 mins down the highway. We tried to convince them to come to Mandarin, but they were both pretty beat, so we just had a quick visit and left. Gonna be honest, I was very torn about Mandarin. Obviously, I wanted to go stuff my face, but I also didn't wanna have this huge cheat meal and ruin some of my progress. There was talk of us (parents and I) going there for lunch  today instead, but that didn't happen and it's probably for the best.

Next, I started getting a cough yesterday morning and I thought it was from screaming at the Leafs game 2 nights ago, but the more I coughed, the more my ears and throat started to hurt and I thought I might actually be getting sick. I wasn't gonna let that stop me from working out in the evening though, so I grabbed some lozenges and Ibuprofen in my way to the game and just pushed myself enough to stay the whole time, but not so much to make my symptoms worse. I'm glad that I went, for many reasons, but mainly cuz as I was changing to leave, a girl came into the change room and told me she'd seen me around a bunch and had really noticed a physical change in me in the last few weeks. I pretty much floated out of the gym after that. lol

And, lastly, this morning, cuz I'm always curious, I decided to weigh myself. Used the bathroom, got naked, and stepped on. The reading came up and I thought I should do it again in case it was a fluke. So, I got on again and gave me the same read out: 3lbs down. Now, I'll take that reading with a grain of salt (figuratively), but if it's true, that's fantastic. The real test will be to see if that reading comes up during my next official weigh-in. We shall see, but I'm optimistic.

Oh, I lied, one more thing. I bought some bags and frozen fruits (strawberries and blueberries) and made myself a smoothie (with added banana) and it was fantastic. New favourite thing. And the smoothie was only 200 cals and huge. Definitely something I'll continue to do. Omg!

Whoa, that turned out a little longer than I expected. Anyway, off to work for me. Wish me luck making good food choices over the weekend.

My new dresses

Wed. January 15

Why do I always decide to blog when I'm already so tired?

Anywho, I'll try to keep this brief. So, today was the big day; weigh-in day. I waited with baited breath for the digital read out and lo and behold, I was down another 2lbs. Obviously, there is nothing wrong with this, but I'm still struggling with the idea of "only" losing 2lbs. I know, I'm dumb. But I know I lost it the right/healthy way. Just gotta keep reminding myself that slow and steady wins the race. Lemme close this paragraph by saying that I am actually very happy with this and look forward to being down another 2 next week.

Speaking of next week, I got my work schedule for that time period and it looks like it's a pretty perfect set of hours that'll make it possible for me to get to the gym 4 times. And any time that I'm spent working is time that I don't have to sit around and stuff my face. Not that that's been an issue for like 2 weeks, but still. Just gotta do a little meal prep and then there's no reason why it shouldn't be a great week. Health and fitness-wise, not so much the work. It's all front counter and I hate that crap.

Alrighty, that's all. Gonna get some sleep cuz I kinda have an interview tomorrow for a new job. I hope I'm not jinxing this, but I want it really bad. I need to leave McD's and never look back.

Got my tattoo pretty much finished today. Probably just gonna need a few touch ups when it's healed.

Sat. January 11

I'm really struggling with a lot of random thoughts at the moment.

First off, I'm obviously worried about the whole weight thing. I know it's a process, I didn't put it on overnight, I won't lose it overnight, I'm just worried about plateauing or gaining. I've been super faithful to the challenge. Not perfect, but still really good. Been working out. No chocolates, no pastries, etc. I've just heard that your body can get too accustomed to a low cal diet and then you stop losing weight. I'm sure that I'm fat enough that that won't be an issue, but it's still worrisome. And then I'm worried about worrying cuz I know that that can make you put on weight too. Ugh, God damn. I probably need to just relax and trust that things will be ok.

I also have a lot of "messed up" thoughts per se. Nothing too weird or sadistic or whatever. I just feel like I have a very overactive imagination and I'm forever going over various scenarios pertaining to things going on in my life. Just to clarify, I have hypothetical verbal confrontations with people who have fucked me over in the past. Like, I plan what I'll say to them if and when the moment presents itself, and also if I should be the one to go to them first. And I think I have a problem with letting things go. Like grudges and events and things that have been said to me, even from years ago. I don't forgive people, like, ever. Someone accidentally bumps into me on the street and says sorry, that's fine, but if you've screwed me over ever, no way. I personally know that staying mad at someone is exhausting (in more ways than one), but I feel like if I just forgive and forget, the other person has "won". And I have a few more minor issues that I should probably talk to a professional about, but I don't wanna be psychoanalyzed and I'm not crazy, so that's not happening. As bad as it sounds, I feel like I just need more (or better) friends that I can use as sounding boards. For a different perspective and just to get things off my chest.

Anyway, that's all. Just gonna try to enjoy the rest of my weekend and make sure I keep on track.

That's me. Not fat jokes, plz. lol

Wed. January 8

Quick update before I gotta go to work.

Weighed myself this morning and I was down, which means I've lost 6 lbs since last Wednesday. Obviously, I'm super happy about this, but now I'm slightly unsure how to... proceed? Should I aim to lose another 2lbs by this time next week, or should I just be happy that reached my 3rd week goal so quickly? And did I really lose the weight properly? I mean, I ate yesterday, but I did go to bed kinda hungry, so I was borderline starving when I weighed myself. Either way, I'm not gonna sabotage or anything. Just keep doing what I've doing and hope for some more good results. : )

For all my Canadian peeps.

2014 Goals

1) Read 4 books
2) Lose 30lbs 
3) Get a new job
4) Go to the gym at least twice a week
5) Get at least 3 new tattoos and touch up/fix another 3
6) Procrastinate less
7) Keep my room clean and organized
8) Speak my mind more
9) Have $15,000 in my RSP by year end (currently over $10,100)
10) Try to fall asleep and wake up at more reasonable times
11) Hang out with friends more
12) Shop (for clothing) less
13) Be able to do difficult-ish yoga poses and/or the splits.
14) Do what makes me happy
15) Put more effort into my appearance
16) Drink about 2L of water a day

Tue. January 7

Gonna try to keep this post short, otherwise I'll end up rambling and whatever.

- Tried apple slices with (melted) peanut butter for the first time yesterday and I actually kinda like it. I found it helped me deal with the sometimes boring taste of apple. And I had it again today. If anyone's debating this, I would recommend it.

- Wanted to go for a 30 minute walk on my treadmill today, but my nephew was sleeping right across the hall. So, I just bundled up and went for a walk/jog around my street (which is a circle). Took me a little under 50 mins.

- This local grocery store is having a sale on low cal yogurt cups at the moment (3/99 cents) and since the sale started, I've bought 57. Ya, I'm crazy, but they're like the perfect size and it's a good price and they're good til Feb 11. Not that I'll need that long though. lol

- Did a ton of walking yesterday. Home to work, being at work, work to the gym, and then being at the gym. I was exhausted. And then, this morning, I thought I'd weigh myself. I know you shouldn't weigh yourself when you're sore/swollen cuz your muscles are retaining fluids, but I was curious. Anyway, I was down a pound for the day before, which is great, but tomorrow will be the real time that the weigh in matters. If I maintain, that's cool. If I'm down, that's great. And even if I'm up one, I'll still be lower than this time last week. We shall see. *fingers crossed*

Ok, I believe that's everything. Gonna go sleep the pounds away.

Nighty night.

A little frostie after my walk lol

Sun. January 5

So, I'm still doing alright-ish. I think.

I technically only had 2 meals today. One was a sandwich from Quizno's and the other was a chicken caesar salad from a pub. However, at the pub, the people I was with ordered a cheese and onion ale dip or whatever. I did have some, but just a little on 2 small pieces of baguette and 2 small pieces of naan bread. I feel bad cuz I know that's white bread, but I'm trying to remind myself that a few small pieces of bread probably aren't going to hurt my efforts. I will say though that I had a few moments that felt kinda relapse-y. Like, "I ate this bad food, so I might as well just eat more bad food", but that's dumb and counter productive and I'm above that. But, considering how small my entree size salad ending up being, I probably have nothing to worry about.

Another thing I have to keep reminding myself of is that this is a slow process. I didn't put on the weight over night, so I won't lose it over night. I am concerned that when I weigh myself on Wednesday that I won't have lost anything. Or maybe even gained. Guess we'll have to wait and see. Maybe I'm just thinking that way cuz I feel kinda full at the moment.

One thing that I'll probably have working in my favour in the next few months is that my dad's work schedule has changed, so he won't be able to pick me up after work anymore. The only downside to this is it's friggen cold here at the moment, so most days I'll probably need to bring a pair of loose track pants for extra warmth, but no biggie. It also means I'll get a nice, long walk to the gym on the days I decide to go. Google maps estimates it as a 40 or so minute walk, but I've done it in about 30. Walking through the snow might slow me down a little, but that just means I get a more intense cardio work out.

I think that's all I have for now. Wish me healthy eating and good work outs in the coming days.

Night all.

I don't watch GoT, but I get this and find it funny. lol

Fri. January 3

First post of the new year!

Ok, so, I started the no junk food challenge and had one tiny setback. Tim Horton's decided to release a red velvet muffin. I was gonna wait to try it, but it was a limited time thing and I had no idea when it would finish, so I had one on January 1. Dunno if I wanna just shrug my shoulders and call it one cheat in 21 days, so just consider January 2 my start day. Whatever. I'll cross that bridge when I come to it. Otherwise, I'd say I'm pretty well on track. Been making friends with soups and salads, keeping an eye weekly flyers for sales on fruits and veggies, and I've been able to resist a few temptations at my house. Yay me!

I also weighed myself yesterday, so for the time being, it looks like Thursday will be my weigh in day. And as long as I'm down like 2lbs by next Thursday, s'all good and I'm on track.

I must say, I have noticed that I'm feeling pretty good. Like, physically. No digestion issues, no bloating, no tummy aches. I should probably focus a little more on portion control, but I've been inputting my foods on myfitnesspal and I see no major issues with my caloric intake or whatever.

Just gonna keep doing what I'm doing and hopefully the results will follow.

Later taters. : )